Friday, January 18, 2013

"I never played the game, but let me tell you..."



Competitive sports are not character building.  They are character revealing.


I feel the need to issue a disclaimer first.  The sum total of my personal experience in organized, competitive sports consists of playing summer softball with the local park district and junior high volleyball -- and I wasn't very good at either one.  I also want to say that some of my closest friends are coaches, and I have the highest respect for them because they truly demonstrate the character traits that I pray my children will also develop.

Instead, most of my experience with organized, competitive sports is vicarious -- as a spectator, and probably more importantly, as a mom.   Those who compete and coach could argue that I don't have a right to comment about this topic.  That I just don't "get" it.  Perhaps.  But I've been doing A LOT of observing.  And I've collected TONS of completely non-scientific data on the subject. 

I've been immersed in the sports culture ever since my son was old enough to kick a soccer ball and hold a bat.  When my two daughters entered the sports world, my investment of time increased exponentially.  I've sat in the bleachers of gyms and football and soccer fields all over southern Illinois.

We start them out young.  Before they are even capable of understanding the rules of the "game" we have them out in it - running and throwing and catching and hitting - some doing it better than others, for sure.

And then we sign them up for a team.  I think it begins here.  Organized athletics start to reveal a bit of who we really are, our true character.  We start to compare.  And we start to place more value on the kids who display more skill.  They are now somehow more important.  Which means other kids are less important.  We've now demonstrated to our kids what we truly value -- their athletic ability.  It might be subtle at first, but kids get it.  They know. And they remember.

Sports are only tools.  They are tools consisting of balls, bats, gloves, shoulder pads, knee pads, bases, goal posts, pucks and nets.  They are tools used on fields of grass, or wooden floors, or sheets of ice.  They are tools with books that explain how to use them properly and what to do when they are used improperly.  They are neither inherently good -- or bad.

Just like any tool, they can be used to build or to tear down.  However unlike most other tools, the building up and tearing down refers to people -- human beings -- often children or adolescents.  And THAT'S the problem.  Too many of us don't get that.

These tools are placed in the hands of coaches and players and referees and umpires and judges.  And then the rest of us watch them use the tools and we make our own judgments about how they're doing -- parents, grandparents, and others.

Character is revealed all along the line.  

Character is revealed in the coaches.  Is their primary goal to develop PLAYERS, or PEOPLE? What do they value the most?  At the end of the day, or the end of their coaching career, what will matter the most?  The win/loss record?  Or all the kids they had the privilege of knowing, who looked up to them for guidance and advice, who became better people because of them?

Character is revealed in the players.  How do they treat one another?  What do they say to each other in the locker room, on the bench, on the playing field?  Do those with more "skill" feel more important?  How do the starters treat those who sit on the bench?  And how do the bench players treat the starters? 

Character is revealed in the spectators -- parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, siblings, friends -- before, during and after the game.  Do our kids hear at least as much praise from us when they demonstrate compassion and humility as when they play well in a game?  Do they know that we value them for who they are INSIDE far more than what they can do OUTSIDE on the court or the field?  And what about our behavior as spectators?  Is it really OK to loudly demonstrate our disagreement with a referee's call during a game?  I know that it's become an accepted practice in our society.    I also know that I'VE done it myself on occasion.  But is it right??  What does it reveal about our character?  People are watching us.  Our children are watching us.  What are we teaching them? 

Sports are not character building -- they are character revealing.

Sports are tools, and in the hands of the right people, those who aspire to develop good character traits, they can be very useful.  People help other people develop good character.  Coaches, parents, mentors, teachers, grandparents, youth pastors, friends.

I am praying that God will help me see EACH player as His priceless child, and EACH coach as God's instrument -- one who is investing a great deal of time and energy into our children.   I am praying that He will constantly remind me that it really is more than just a game. Because our children are being formed and changed.


I am praying God will help me see all coaches, players, referees, and spectators as PEOPLE first.

People -- equally loved and valued by God.  Not because of what they DO, but because of who they ARE.  God's children.

And as God's children -- the playing field is completely level.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Give It Up. Let It Go. Throw It Down.

   

                      Moses

What do you hold in your hand today?

To whom, or to what, are you bound?

Are you willing to give it to God right now?

Give it up.  Let it go.  Throw it down.

 

In the late 70's, singer/songwriter Ken Medema wrote this song, simply entitled "Moses."  It's a powerfully written interpretation of the conversation between God and Moses when God called him from the burning bush and told him that he was to lead the people of Israel out of bondage.

It was an enormous request.  Huge.  Herculean.  Elephantine.  Gargantuan. (I love my thesaurus).  God wanted Moses to go back to Egypt (the place he fled from after murdering an Egyptian), go to the Pharoah (the military and political leader of Egypt) and demand that he release all of the Jews who were the slave labor of the Empire.  Who could blame Moses for his response?  "Not me, Lord!"  And then he listed his reasons why.  They were good ones.


  • The Israelite people probably won't even listen to me, far less believe what I tell them.
  • And how in the world will I convince them that it was You, God, Who really spoke to me?
  • Oh, and by the way, I am a terrible public speaker.

But it's actually what Moses says first to God that I think gets at the heart of the matter -- and at the heart of his fear.  

"Who am I, that I should go to Pharoah and bring the Israelites out of Egypt?"  

Moses had become a shepherd.  His place was now with his new wife and son.  His shepherd's rod was now his security.  It defined him.  "Who am I?"  He was a shepherd.



Who am I? Who am I, God, that I should be used by You in this way?  Who am I, God, that You would call ME to do this?  Who am I?


March into mighty Pharoah's castle and demand that he release all of his slave labor?  Lead the entire nation of Israel out of their 400 year-old captivity as slaves in Egypt?  I would be TERRIFIED.  Moses had good reasons to question God's request - but I guarantee that I could come up with better ones!

Actually, I could come up with hundreds of reasons why God can't use me -- shouldn't use me.  And truthfully, I have to fight those reasons almost every day.

We all have them.  Reasons.  Excuses, really.  We might not voice them very often, but we live by them.  And we put limitations upon ourselves, and God,  because of them.  I've heard all these reasons/excuses before -- and I've used some of them myself:

  • I'm too old.  I'm too young.  
  •  I'm single.  I'm married.  I'm divorced.  I'm widowed.
  • I don't have my degree.  I don't have the right degree.  I don't have enough degrees.
  • I'm not a good communicator.  I'm not a good listener.
  • I'm in the middle of a relationship.  I just broke up with my boyfriend/girlfriend/fiance.
  • I don't have enough resources.  
  •  I don't have a job.  I don't have the right job. 
  • I'm just a student.  I don't have any experience.  
  • I'm just a mother.  I'm just a father.  I don't have any children.  I can't have any children.

Whatever reasons we might give on the surface, often there are deeper issues at work that are far more personal, and far more limiting -- even damaging -- to us.  Issues that truly get to the heart of the matter.  Issues that eventually have us crying out,  as Moses did, "Who am I?"   Scars, brokenness, past failures, lack of confidence, physical limitations, lack of education, crippling fear.  Believe me, I know.

Perhaps you're in bondage to what other people think about you.  And you've allowed their opinion to define who you are, what you can do, and what you are incapable of doing.  It is often those closest to us who whisper that haunting question in our ear, "Who are YOU to do this?  You're not qualified.  I know all about you.  I know you can't do it."

"Not me, Lord!"

But then God asked Moses to throw his shepherd's rod on the ground.  A simple request, perhaps.  Except that the rod had become the symbol of his life.  His security.  His identity.  "Throw down your rod, Moses." 

And then it happened.  In the Hands of God, the ordinary became the extraordinary.  The rod of Moses became the rod of God.

"Throw it down, Moses.  See what I can do with you!"  And God used Moses to free the nation of Israel.

So what do you hold in YOUR hand today?  To whom, or to what, are YOU bound?  Is it your past?  Is it your present situation?  Is it a person?  Is it fear?

Whatever it is, give it up. 

Let it go into the mighty Hands of your loving Father.  Release it to God.  You really can let it go.  You really must  let it go.

And then... watch and see.  Watch and see what God can do with you when you're FREE. 




If you'd like to hear Ken Medema singing "Moses," click this link.  It's an incredibly powerful song.
www.godtube.com/watch/?v=WLGZ7LNX 

Thursday, January 3, 2013

I Resolve...to Remember

I Resolve...to Remember

December 14, 2012 -- Twenty children (aged 6 & 7) and six teachers were shot and killed in Newtown, CT

April 16, 2007 -- Thirty-two people (both students and professors) were gunned down at Virginia Tech University in Blacksburg, VA

October 2, 2006 -- Five little girls were killed in a one-room Amish schoolhouse in Lancaster County, PA

April 20, 1999 -- Twelve students and one teacher were shot and killed at Columbine High School in Colorado

There are more.  Countless more.  Seemingly random acts of violence and hatred and evil.  For the most part, unexplainable.  Certainly incomprehensible.

But this is not a post about gun control laws or the NRA or politics or the Constitution of the United States.  It's not that I don't believe those things are important.  I just don't find social media a very useful way to discuss these matters, primarily because there really is no discussion.  We post a status, and we get people to like it.  Or they disagree and write a negative response back.  We write a blog.  People agree or disagree, perhaps with a comment or two.    But it's all electronic.  Wires and plastic and towers and satellites and cables and keys.  There is no flesh and blood.  No one sitting across the table from us, sipping a cup of coffee. No one looking us in the eye.

So although I don't want to "discuss" gun control or anything else of that nature, I DO want to talk about something very important.

I want to remember.

I want to remember -- not just the death of so many innocent people -- but their LIVES.

I want to remember the most important lesson that I learned through these tragedies.

LIFE IS PRECIOUS and  PEOPLE ARE IMPORTANT. 

Most of us believe that life is precious and people are important.  The problem is we often don't live like we believe it.  We move on.  We have things to do and places to go and people to see.  We are all about activity and productivity.

So how do we live it?  How do we remember?  In the wake of the Newtown tragedy, many people are encouraging us to engage in acts of kindness to remember the lives lost.  Twenty-six acts of kindness. Not just a wonderfully redeeming idea, but one that the Apostle Paul would definitely affirm.  In his letter to the Romans he wrote, "Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:21). 

Overcome evil with good.  Within each of us exists such a capacity to do good.  Because within each of us is the Image of God.  Sinners, yes.  In need of God's grace and mercy, absolutely.  Saved only through the sacrifice of our Lord Jesus Christ, indeed.  But saved to DO GOOD WORKS (Eph. 2:10).

Good works.  Acts of kindness.

I'm wondering if any of you will join me on an adventure.  It's certainly not an original idea of mine, but one that I've borrowed from Richard Foster (Celebration of Discipline).  I even use it as a class assignment (one of my favorite).   It's a beautiful twist on the idea of doing acts of kindness for others.

"Acts of Hidden Service"

The idea is simply this:  doing acts of kindness, acts of service, anonymously.   Intentionally trying to keep your identity a secret.  Desiring no recognition, no reward, no thanks.  Just the knowledge that you are helping someone.  Just the knowledge that you are remembering that life is precious and people are important -- and you can make a positive difference in someone's life.

The amazing thing about doing acts of hidden kindness is that while the recipient can't thank you, they often feel better about those around them because anyone could be "guilty" of helping them.  Anyone.  So instead of seeing the world as a hostile place, it looks a bit brighter.  People look a bit more caring.  And evil is overcome with good.

We were created to do good works in Christ Jesus.  Because life is precious -- and people are of infinite value to God.  It was LOVE that motivated God to send His Son.  May this same love motivate us to care for others.

Will you join me on this adventure?